“As I settle in to write this, my daily horoscope just popped up and it reads “My home should reflect who I am and support who I want to become.” The universe is a fated force, I swear it.”
“I had never lived alone before I moved into my tiny apartment 7.5 years ago. It was a month before my 25th birthday, I had just moved back to Denver, was recovering from a severe medical trauma, and I was separated and pursuing divorce from my now ex-husband. I felt like I was starting my whole life over from scratch. I wasn’t, but you try convincing a dramatic 25 year old of anything. At the time, I thought I’d live here for a year, maybe 2, and then move on.”
“But there is magic in being alone, and without even realizing it, I started to settle into myself as well as my home. In that settling, I began to feel a sense of protection over my space and the energy within it. A studio apartment that I’d once considered a place to sleep and have people over to, became a home I enjoyed being myself by myself in and I no longer wanted to let anyone else disrupt that. I made friends with my neighbors in the building and the businesses in the surrounding blocks, and I started to feel a sense of safety in my home I hadn’t realized I’d been looking for. Once I found that safety, I began to flourish.”
“Family and friends have suggested I move somewhere larger in many gentle and not so gentle ways over the years, and I always respond “but this space is enough.” It’s been enough to hold me while I underwent intensive therapy for eating disorder and sexual trauma. It’s been enough to have dance parties and dinners with friends. It’s been enough to host every member of my family (not all at once) when they visit me. It’s been enough to start my now thriving bakery out of. It’s been enough to keep me warm in the winter and cool in the summer. It’s been enough to help me build a life I once only dreamed of. It’s been enough, and it continues to be enough. Because this space is for me.”
“I have thought only of myself as I’ve collected items and made changes, designing a space that is equal parts escape and the world tells women we must put other’s needs before our own, and oh what a marvelous feeling it has been to release that pressure from myself within these walls. I became myself in this 340sq box, and I think that’s what makes any building a home.”
